Crawfish ice cream🦞: Houston’s Red Circle has it. Why?

HOUSTON – I’ve been told if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.

I rarely listen to that advice.

You all KNOW how I feel about crawfish. Why, oh why, did someone come up with this?

It’s the headline that made me gag this weekend. And I’m gagging about it again on Monday.

Did you miss it? Watch the reactions to eating this confection (that I thought was a belated April Fools’ Day joke) in the video player above.

I don’t want to throw shade all over Houston-based Red Circle on this, because the flavors featured in the segment do sound fun, especially the ube, boba and Hot Cheeto and horchata flavors.

I do want to say you wouldn’t have crawfish and milk at a crawfish boil (unless you’re out of beer, perhaps), so why do this to perfectly fine milk products?

“We’re crawfish lovers, we’re in Houston,” Red Circle representative Nickey Ngo said on KPRC 2. ”We take crawfish very seriously in Houston.”

If that’s so, I would imagine Houston wouldn’t want anyone messing with the tried-and-true crawfish formula. This is just “nope” territory.

With summer coming round the bend, other strange mixes are also hitting the market. Ranch ice cream anyone? No. Mustard ice cream? Not anyone. OK, maybe if you have a bad breakup or you’re pregnant and there’s NOTHING left in the freezer. And I mean NOTHING. Those frostbitten icepops are even more inviting than the idea of this “food.”

Just stop, businesses and companies. Stop with all this silliness. It’s gross and it’s definitely not being eaten. Or at least, just do small batches. Think of the cows. Think of the planet. Don’t think crawfish.

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