The Texans and the Saturday afternoon Wild Card game: A marriage as old as time

If you’ve paid attention to the Houston Texans over the past decade, you’ve probably watched at least one NFL playoff game featuring the Bulls on Parade.

Dating back to their first playoff-qualifying season in 2011, the Texans have made eight total trips to the postseason, with each run starting in the Wild Card round. While any playoff run is typically something to celebrate, a disturbing pattern has emerged from Texans playoff football, and it might be the signal of a deep-seated conspiracy to hide Texans football from the public.

Okay, that might be dramatic, but the NFL does have a history of slating the Texans into arguably the least desirable time slot every time they make the playoffs. This pattern first came to my attention while listening to Monday’s episode of the Pardon My Take podcast, so credit to Big Cat and PFT Commenter for uncovering the NFL’s sly, anti-Texans scheduling tactics.

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Here’s a recap of the Texans’ eight Wild Card game appearances in their team’s history. Let me know if you recognize the pattern:

1. 2011: Wild Card vs. Bengals, Saturday, 3:30 p.m.
2. 2012: Wild Card vs. Bengals, Saturday, 3:30 p.m.
3. 2015: Wild Card vs. Chiefs, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.
4. 2016: Wild Card vs. Raiders, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.
5. 2018: Wild Card vs. Colts, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.
6. 2019: Wild Card vs. Bills, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.
7. 2023: Wild Card vs. Browns, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.
8. 2024: Wild Card vs. Chargers, Saturday, 3:35 p.m.

Yep, you read that right. In the Texans’ eight playoff appearances, they have been handed the early Saturday timeslot each and every time.

This timeslot is not considered “Prime Time” by NFL playoff game standards, and the numbers back that up. In the final four years of the 12-team NFL postseason format (between 2017 and 2020), the early Saturday timeslot ranked last in viewership every single year.

In the four seasons since the NFL shifted to a 14-team bracket (between 2021 and 2024), the early Saturday slot has still hovered near the bottom of the rankings. In the 2023-24 playoffs, the early Saturday slot was only able to beat out the Chiefs-Dolphins game in viewership (which was streamed exclusively on Peacock rather than a standard broadcast).

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Does this mean that the NFL secretly hates the Texans? Not necessarily, but I think it’s reflective of how the league feels about Houston’s team from an analytical standpoint, and its sentiments might not be the most flattering.

Don’t get me wrong; there are several glaring reasons as to why the Texans don’t have the glamorous market aura of other franchises. They play in the AFC South, which is probably the weakest division in the entire league in terms of media markets. The Houston market is respectable, but the Texans share the spotlight with the likes of Indianapolis, Nashville, and Jacksonville—with the ladder being the league’s most discussed subject for team relocation.

I think sharing a state with the Dallas Cowboys hurts the Texans a little bit too. Although the Texans have a large and passionate fanbase, it’d be hard for any franchise to compete in adjacent markets with the most valuable sports team in the world, and the Texans are no exception. The Cowboys are an established international brand, while many people would probably be surprised to see Texans merchandise outside of Harris County.

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With those downsides on the table, I think there’s hope that the Texans may one day be freed from the shackles of the early Saturday timeslot. The team has now made the playoffs in two consecutive seasons and boasts one of the NFL’s most compelling young head coach/quarterback duos. If the Texans can keep making postseason trips an annual occasion, they might finally be liberated from playoff football in the Saturday sun.

Another thing to note is that the Texans have never advanced past the divisional round. They have an impressive 5-3 record in their eight aforementioned Wild Card games, but they’ve lost the very next game in each of their five multi-game playoff runs.

I think advancing to an AFC Championship Game (or even a Super Bowl if we’re thinking bigger) could earn the Texans enough respect across the league to break free from Saturday afternoon purgatory.